E-Dribble

We track down the one-eyed man and take care of the offending orb with a pencil.

In the  quest to be classified as much of a moron as their sensory laden brethren,  the deaf have decided that it should be their right to create deaf children.

What?

I said that the deaf want to create deaf children.

WHAT?

I said that the deaf want to create children that are also deaf!

WHAT?

Holy crap, what is your problem?

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I want to congratulate Bob, who posted our 100th spamilicious comment:

Bob would like to provide us some Cialis, voyeur vids and nurse anal sex.  Nurse anal is a lot better than normal anal because if you get hurt, she can tie a tourniquet.

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New Hotness: Farming out the service to a provider that does it for free, but continuing to charge the fee.

Added pizazz: Putting a spin on it in your notices to customers to make it seem like it’s the best thing since sliced bread.

Wildblue obviously has been busy optimizing this process:

From the Wildblue notice:

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How do you keep visitors at your news site and not at a competitor’s?  Simple, really.  You provide them riveting and hard hitting news that nobody else is providing.

CNN shows us how:

Absolutely genius.

Have some time to travel?  Want to see the world?  Why not consider Luanda, Angora?  Let’s look at some the of highlights of the locale, shall we?

• From the Wikipedia entry: “The people of Angola are stoics. They have a deep understanding of patience, and they know that it will always turn out right, no matter what, because now peace has been brought.”
• It is located on the coast of Africa and boasts gorgeous beaches.
• The police will shoot and kill you for absolutely no reason.  They will then get back in their vehicle and leave.

From the country whose major contribution to society is the 419 scam, we can now add governmentally sanctioned murder by the local police.

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I still wouldn’t get anything important done, but I’d get all of the unnecessary stuff done in a much quicker fashion:

(I got lazy on yo-yo me.)

In what must be considered “If this happens to you, you deserve it”, friends and family were bilked out of more than $800,000 by Stacey and Brent Eric Finley.

How? Brent told them that Stacey was a CIA agent that could hook them up by having their medical problems diagnosed via satellite imaging.

But wait, there’s more.

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She just isn’t discriminating in regards to who can use her vagina.

I guess that’s what these women were shooting for.  They want you to quit thinking they’re sluts.  They don’t want to stop being sluts, but they’d like you to have the decency not to think it of them.

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All future calls to this boy will be forwarded to voicemail.

While the loss of life is tragic, you have to admit that Darwin was being thwarted at every turn up until the very end, what with blinking barricades, a horn sounding on the train and the other people smart enough to stand and wait for the train to pass.

In spite of  all the visual and audio cues, Daniel continued his phone conversation up until the very end.

I’d like to play a game. I want to list as many synonyms for a word as I can think of:

Stupid: brainless, moronic, dull, slow, dense, thick, senseless, dolt, feeble, idiot, vacuous, Kristin Wallace

Not great, but I feel that I wasn’t properly prepared for…

What? Oh, that last one? That one is pretty easy to explain. Meet Kristin Wallace, buyer of lakes and instigator of ridiculous lawsuits. Want to know why we have to deal with the frivolous lawsuits that choke our court systems? Well, look no further than Kristin.

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