E-Dribble

If you jail victims of theft, then eventually, you will run out of potential victims.

So says Olu Agbi, the Nigerian high commissioner, concerning the victims of 419 scams.

People who send their money are as guilty as those who are asking them to send the money.

Another of his quotable quotes:

It is not in the character of Nigerians to be engaged in this kind of scam.

This coming from the commissioner whose country had a scam named after it.

(continue reading…)

Subject: JOB OFFER
From: AMAX OIL & GAS INC <info@Amax.com>

Reply-To: amamaxoil02@gmail.com

AMAX OIL & GAS INC wrote:

FROM THE DESK OF THE DIRECTOR
AMAX OIL & GAS INC
Level 36, Tower 2
PETRONAS Twin Towers
Kuala Lumpur City Centre
50088 Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
MALAYSIA
Tel: +60 14645 8330

ATTN: APPLICANT

INTERNATIONAL EXPATRIATE OFFICIAL JOB ONLINE INTERVIEW

Your name has been shortlisted/Choosen among the Lucky expatriates who
submitted the CV to the MALAYSIA ONLINE JOB ,before we will issue you

the
Success Letter and the Contract Document You have to fill the following
informations and send it back to us
Via-Email: amamaxoil02@gmail.com  

Full Names

City:

State:

Country:

Zipcode:

Sex:

Phone:

AGE:

MARITAL STATUS:

Get back to me as soon as possible.

Bar.Abdul Mohammed,
Head of Recruitment Service.
AMAX OIL & GAS INC(Sarawak

FROM THE DESK OF YOUR RECIPIENT

You are a fucking retard.

thanks,

json

No, I didn’t forget an ‘s’ at the end.  I’m talking about Wired Magazine.  I received the latest issue last week and after pulling out only the blow-in cards and pages with ads on both sides, I was left with about one article and 38 full page ads.  I didn’t count the ads that didn’t span a full page.

I guess this is to be expected from a “technically savvy” magazine whose online polls only support Internet Explorer on Windows machines.

Luckily, my emo and 17 magazines still have plenty of content.

Subject: Notification of Bequest
From: Peter Adams <p_adams520@yahoo.in>

Reply-To: peteradams077@yahoo.com.hk

Date: 12:20 AM

Peter Adams wrote:

I have a new email address!

You can now email me at: p_adam520@yahoo.in

Notification of your ($USD15,100,000 ) inheritance to claim as NEXT OF KIN to my late cleint.

- Peter Adams

Dearest Peter,

Are you so fucking lazy that you can no longer copy & paste another’s hard work?  You actually expect people to believe this bullshit? You sir, are not only a fucking moron, but you may be the laziest and most incompetent moron I’ve had the pleasure of receiving a 419 scam from yet.  I’m considering giving you my money if you promise to purchase and ingest some ground glass and then chase it with some cyanide.

While receiving a tabasco sauce enema.

thanks,
json

In spite of Microsoft’s insistence that they’ve created the ultimate OS with Vista, it seems that most reports still have XP outselling it.

This is of course, in spite of the fact that XP is no longer officially sold. Need a copy of XP? Head on over to NewEgg, where a loophole gets exploited to sell legitimate OEM copies of XP Pro.

Oh and that whole deal where Ballmer insisted that Vista was the most secure OS ever?  Yeah, he was just kidding.

It seems that I’m finding myself unable to muster the linquistic prowess to have some fun and now am just using the verbal equivalent of a sledgehammer.

Lady Julia Peters wrote:

Subject: I NEED YOUR ASSISTANCE
From: Lady Julia Peters <ladyjuliapeters105@yahoo.com.co>
Reply-To: ladyjuliapeters1-uk@hotmail.com
Date: 07:59 PM

¡Tengo nueva dirección de correo!

Ahora puedes escribirme a:ladyjuliapeters105@yahoo.com.co

I am Julia Peters,I have cancer and something 2 share with you about my Fund contact me 4 details

- Lady Julia Peters

Hi there Julia,

I hope you die soon. I hope it’s painful.  Finally, I hope you rot in hell after your death.

thanks,
json

Before you give me any grief, keep in mind that a proper lady should never use texting abbereviations.  Especially if she’s dying of cancer.  God h8s ur abbrvs.