No form of media is safe from my simple minded attempts at humor.
by schwim on Jan.24, 2009, under Spam
Years ago, if you dealt with domain names in any way, your snail mailbox probably saw one of these pieces of mail at least once every couple of months.
Scamming pieces of shit would send out mail to publicly available registered owners of domains with what looked like a legitimate renewal bill for their domain. You would pay them money and your domain wouldn’t get renewed.
Because, you know… they weren’t really your registrar.
They were scamming pieces of shit. We had already established this. Try to stick with me, mkay?
Well, the long, atrophied arm of the law came down on them and they got in big trouble for doing that. The number of mails received went down drastically.
But the allure of an easy buck was just sitting there. They didn’t want to do fake renewals any longer, since it was already skylined and therefore subject to the law of diminished returns, but they knew that there was some way to continue on in the same tradition.
Enter these geniuses:
If you look at the top half, it’s intention is to look like a bill. However, since the last time they made it look like a bill went so poorly, in the bottom half of the solicitation, they’ve told you that it wasn’t actually a bill.
What do they do for $65.oo? They submit your site to 20 search engines. You of course can do this for free by simply visiting the search site in question. They will also send you a report of search results. You can also get this for free through Google Analytics.
That’s all. Expected more? Very sorry to disappoint. What did you expect for $65.00? Something you couldn’t do yourself? What do you think this is, the Salvation Army?
I get the mails all the time. Last night, I had too much time on my hands and decided to respond:
I figured it was only fair. They send me what looked like a bill but wasn’t, so I sent them what looked like a check but wasn’t. I pulled out all the stops too. It’s actually a separately printed paper, taped to the center of the page.
If anyone could appreciate the effort I went to, I imagine it’s them.
January 30th, 2009 on 5:38 am
Mornin” schwim.
C’mon man! You’ve gotta admit … that classy gradient stationary is kinda nice … and that pinwheel logo is just oh-so-cool!
I note that at least they have actually changed the reference numbers between their marks. MIne ended in 250.
But don’t lose all hope! The other clods are still lurking in the shadows too.
These guys ( http://www.domainrenewalgroup.com/ ) wanted $95 bucks for five years. What a value!
I especially loved the “We ain’t doing nothin’ wrong, and we ain’t responsible if you lose your domain name,” disclaimer on the back of the bill … in 4 point, light grey type.
Yeah buddy! I think these guys have actually found a recession/depression proof industry. They wouldn’t be around if there weren’t a few professional victims out there sending in those hot $95.00 cheques.
And so goes our e-rollicking e-ride down the e-road.