E-Dribble

I noticed in my refers today something that made me smile:

Notice the one at the bottom.  I looked back in the last year and  five other people searched for “how to commit arson without getting caught” Doing a traceroute on all six IPs shows that proxies were not used during the search.

Here’s a pro-tip for all six of you.  If you think it’s a good idea to search the web for this without using some kind of blind proxy, then you are not the type of person that will succeed at this particular endeavor.  Think about hiring a professional.

Don’t know where to find one?  Just Google it.

Edit: This is better than I ever could have imagined.  Since posting this, 11 more mental midgets have visited to find out how to torch something without becoming the latest sausage recipient at the local prison.

Thanks for the smiles.

Twitter was a victim of a DDoS attack over the past couple of days(It wasn’t me, promise).  Don Reisinger of CNet is trying to help the twits  during the trying periods during which Twitter is down by   suggesting alternatives to posting to Twitter. While I’m sure the Twitter crowd is thankful for the tutorial, I’m having a giggle that the Twitter crowd is too stupid to figure out what to do with their newly found free time.

Oddly absent in his how-to  is the suggestion that they do something productive. But then again, we are talking about the Twitter crowd.

Although I can’t seem to find a form of media that doesn’t treat it like the second coming of Jesus, it seems that the productive public(well, those who haven’t had a labotomy yet) seem to be giving Twitter the cold shoulder.  Check the stats.

• 85% follow friends
• 54% follow celebrities
• 29% follow family members
• 29% follow companies

Keep in mind that that last number is the only thing Twitter really cares about.  They need companies with deep pockets to want to use Twitter, if they’re going to stay in business. If nobody is there to follow a business, the business has no reason to be at Twitter.  Unfortunately for them, 12 year olds aren’t a great demographic to dominate, since allowances can only go so far.

This was my favorite part of the article, however:

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Most of the regulars know my stance on what I consider is the crippling addiction of open source software to fork.  The nerds just can’t seem to help themselves.

Well, as I stated in the previous post, it’s definitely not just the OS developers that find this to be a powerful attribute of FOSS.  Count the DB devs in, too! After Oracle’s purchase of Sun, shit hit the fan in regards to MySQL and offshoots appeared overnight.  If you think it’s because of Oracle, you would be wrong.  Listening to the lead developers that are jumping ship to develop their own version, they were unhappy even when Sun was in the captain’s chair.  This was just the straw that broke the camel’s back.

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What do you do when you create a national scare for ratings and it becomes incresingly obviious that you pulled everything out of your ass?

Well, first you ease into the letdown, making sure that you phrase it in such a way that it’s ambiguously insinuated that the risk is still lurking around the corner.  Then you begin ridiculing the hordes of people that fell for your bullshit.

You see, the death toll for the swine flu currently stands at 19. The average number of deaths annually from standard influenza?  36, o00.  While you can creatively adjust numbers to make the word “epidemic” fit, it seems that the disparity between these two figures are too great for even the US media to stretch.

Now, I’m not blaming the news agencies.  They’re no better than spammers.  They’re in it to make money and everyone knows that fear sells.  The mental defects that watched the news and immediately donned paper masks while wrapping themselves in cheesecloth deserved every minute of anguish that they endured.

I’m just sorry that I didn’t have the forsight to buy stock in dust masks.

Say you and your eight best buds want to commit arson and burn down a building.  How do you go about doing it without getting caught?

First off, Never video tape it.  That’s just asking for trouble.

If you video tape it, make sure that you don’t post it to Youtube.

If you do post it to Youtube, do not, under any circumstances, place credits at the end of the video, listing all of the people involved in the crime.

These people should have talked to me before burning down a building.

Years ago, if you dealt with domain names in any way, your snail mailbox probably saw one of these pieces of mail at least once every couple of months.

Scamming pieces of shit would send out mail to publicly available registered owners of domains with what looked like a legitimate renewal bill for their domain.  You would pay them money and your domain wouldn’t get renewed.

Because, you know… they weren’t really your registrar.

They were scamming pieces of shit.  We had already established this.  Try to stick with me, mkay?

Well, the long, atrophied arm of the law came down on them and they got in big trouble for doing that.  The number of mails received went down drastically.

But the allure of an easy buck was just sitting there.  They didn’t want to do fake renewals any longer, since it was already skylined and therefore subject to the law of diminished returns, but they knew that there was some way to continue on in the same tradition.

Enter these geniuses:

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